Today outside was cloudy and cold, this wasted our plans to stay a whole day out taking pictures.
I wanted to try to plant two sunflower seeds. One comes from the present I received from the webmaster for my 21st birthday. The other is one year younger because I hadsaved the “present fruits” and planted eight of them in following spring.
I had the luck to see a little sunflower blooming at the end of November and still looking nice in December, why shouldn’t they bloom a few days away from spring? We’ll see what happens.
These 2 little sunflower seeds, challenged by the weather conditions, remind me so many events that, I’d really love to see them blooming.
The ring is our promise ring and is two years old now. I love the way the numbers three and two repeated for several reasons today.
Eyes burns and head hurts and I can’t see well…
I couldn’t see much beauty in my day today, only seeds of hope survived.
Posted February 12th, 2010. Add a comment
… and thinking “that day is 35 months away now, but still actual” 
.
Posted February 3rd, 2010. Add a comment
It was May 1st 2009.
The weather was cold, the sky was full of big dark clouds, a little unusual for that period of the year.
Despite all, a little ray of light won the clouds for a few minutes and allowed me to take this picture.
I love when this happens.
Posted January 16th, 2010. Add a comment
I feel a little gloomy
although today I had the luck to spend a few hours trying to find something popping up from darkness
and although I still have the luck to dream and hope I’ll be able to leave a mark, even a thin one, on this world that will be “enlighten” by The Eternal Light.
Despite all, I already decided a life course,
that appears to be the opposite of the one that should be, but, this it the only possible good one at the moment…
therefore I’ve to complete my work, to complete what I’ve started 3 years ago (and I’m already late).
Completing this work might mean to never change direction, but surely it means, now, to drop the camera for a while… to keep it always beside me and ready to sh3oot, because I do need it to “breath” and go ahead… but being ready only for taking pictures if “something comes” and stop looking for that “something” for a little while…
Tonight I probably saw the end of the last day of “freedom to look for”, that’s why I feel a little gloomy but, only a little.
Today sunset said me “Stop playing with the camera and go back to your real work”, but it told me in a kind and comfortable way.
As that little star wanted to tell “it’s not ALL over when sun goes down”…
I know, this happen at every sunset, but that’s the one I’ve been watching to for 1 hour and half peeking out from a narrow window of the small attic of my brother’s house.
Once again I was being stuck by narrow spaces but, today, I was feeling free because I had the freedom to look around, to see sky around me.
Posted January 3rd, 2010. 2 comments
21st December
Today is my cousin’s birthday.
Today, 3 years ago, I discovered that one of my best friend had a cancer, (who died a few months later).
Tonight died a person who was very close to my boyfriend. Today I tried to comfort, with caress, smile and hugs my boyfriend…
Today I finally had the chance to give a “thanking” present to a friend. In May she told me about a photography contest that I won (500€). Today she was smiling and seeming really happy to receive the little presents I gave her. We had a lovely hour of conversation.
As always, today, happy events mixed up with sad ones.
I usually tend to think: “Darn! There is always something that waste beauty”… but today, for some weird reason, i realized that all these events, in a way or another, have a common positive aspect: speak of love.
Love for a family member living miles away but thanks internet you can send her the best birthday wishes.
Love for a friend who is suffering, who suffered, but you’ll never forget.
Love for a family member, who you are going to say “goodbye” for a last time… on this earth. Love for your boyfriend who looked like as a silent and gloomy five years old child, all day long.
Love for friends, that help friends in exchange for nothing, or that enjoy to “pleasantly surprise” friends with an unexpected present…
Kindness helps, always.
I wanted to write a note about all these events. I wanted to link them with those picture of “flowers on a black background” I so love to take… because I think that sometimes “sad” events might “highlight love” as a black background can “highlights” colors, details, light.
Posted December 21st, 2009. Add a comment
Nonessential, unusual and inefficient
Probably the only one in this place and time, and stronger than I appear. Probably not.
Definitely alive, real and loved
Posted December 4th, 2009. 1 comment
