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“It is impossible, I hope, for any Catholic to write any book on any subject,
above all this subject, without showing that he is a Catholic”
G.K. Chesterton - The Everlasting Man
And I hope that, somehow, it’s the same even in photography, even for “not so skilled” people like me 
I feel a little gloomy
although today I had the luck to spend a few hours trying to find something popping up from darkness
and although I still have the luck to dream and hope I’ll be able to leave a mark, even a thin one, on this world that will be “enlighten” by The Eternal Light.
Despite all, I already decided a life course,
that appears to be the opposite of the one that should be, but, this it the only possible good one at the moment…
therefore I’ve to complete my work, to complete what I’ve started 3 years ago (and I’m already late).
Completing this work might mean to never change direction, but surely it means, now, to drop the camera for a while… to keep it always beside me and ready to sh3oot, because I do need it to “breath” and go ahead… but being ready only for taking pictures if “something comes” and stop looking for that “something” for a little while…
Tonight I probably saw the end of the last day of “freedom to look for”, that’s why I feel a little gloomy but, only a little.
Today sunset said me “Stop playing with the camera and go back to your real work”, but it told me in a kind and comfortable way.
As that little star wanted to tell “it’s not ALL over when sun goes down”…
I know, this happen at every sunset, but that’s the one I’ve been watching to for 1 hour and half peeking out from a narrow window of the small attic of my brother’s house.
Once again I was being stuck by narrow spaces but, today, I was feeling free because I had the freedom to look around, to see sky around me.
On Friday afternoon I tried to pass a written test, that’s why I disappeared for a little while… I don’t know the result yet.
I’m trying to cleaning up old picture folders in order to finally get that “whole” copy in a couple of external HD
I’ve already filled 50% of the iMac HD and I’ve to save so many pictures…
The problem is that when I start cleaning up and find old pictures I star recalling all events related to each shot. Even if those are 8 years old or more… I found pictures of baby Elisa too:)
But “recalling past” might be not a problem yet, I mean, you can keep cleaning up while recalling. The real problem comes when I find “interesting” shots.
With “interesting” I mean those shots that are not special, that at the time I’ve taken them I put them in a “not good” imaginary folder but, that, now I’m reconsidering them. I edit them a little. I get new ideas and I start following endless paths… stopping any cleaning up activity.
My boyfriend says it’s typical of creative, another friend says that as any human I’m imitating God, that first create, in apparently random way and then gives an order and gives life to things that “are not”.
I wonder if it’s just a sign of mental disorder…
Among the shots I found tonight there is this one:
A red cloud! I later showed it to my boyfriend and to a friend and they both said: “COOL! It’s amazing”.
Huh?! Are they serious?
I don’t know why they like it… and I’m not so sure I wanna know the reason
I was curious to see when I’ve taken this picture and discovered:”2nd March 2007″. To the world it means nothing probably, but it’s exactly the day before my boyfriend “declared” his love to me (I already knew, but we all need an official day ;D ).
I couldn’t avoid to tease him and saying: “See? The sky was telling that it was going to happen something of terrible and dangerous in a few hours! Who knows if it was and advice for me, for you or for the whole world!”.
My bf laughed, could he do something different with such a crazy girlfriend like me?
